A Reality Check

Its been 5 years since i blogged and I have changed a lot over the past 5 years. But i see that my writing has improved leaps and bounds and I hope to keep coming back here every now and then to keep everyone updated. 

I have realized that i have gone into cycles of ups and downs over the past years and I have realized that Money and people aren’t the thing to bother about, its more about family and self-realization. Lets this homecoming be for the goodness 🙂 

“Trasition” – Dream

A body lied on the bed as if it was dead.. the room was rotting like decomposing fish, The faint noise in the room was coming out of the operational sound of the AC and the SMPS fan of the PC with the heated up fan of the processor inside the cabinet radiating heat. The room looked like no one was inside the room for a eons together. It was too shabby to be called a room and noticing the dust that had settled on the Computer it looked like it wasn’t in use for long but the finger impression on the mouse and keyboard looked as if it was used for excessively almost contradictory to the what the other articles in the room depicted.

Out of a sudden a body wakes up. The guy was really dark in complexion it seemed as if he just dropped in after sun tanning without the creams, but the guy was panting after what looked like close to death run chase. It seemed as if he was chased by something, his facial expression were no different, he looked more stunned unlike his usual easy morning grins and chuckles on his face. He searched for the remote control in his shabby room but to his dismay he forgot where he had kept the remote.. he looks everywhere he would have dropped it.. and he goes  searching even in the desk at the corner of the room and loosing hope goes out of the room and after some time comes back to find the remote underneath the pillow he adjusts the temperature and goes to washroom and washes his face…

It looks as if layers of his makeup had just washed aways and after all his usual chores at the washroom when he lights up the room with his computer monitor.. It was “Avinash” with his usually bright early morning complexion which often fades off at the end of the day.. It seemed that the rotting smell was still thriving in the room. He pickedup the room freshener and sprayed it on the AC vents,  but it was of no use and he knew he had to go bath at 2 O’clock to counter the foul smell in the room.

He enters the washroom for his bath just to hear the Gurkha’s whistling sounds which were accompanied by the howling dogs, screaming cats and unusual screeching sounds of bats and owls in the locality although they were all distinct it seemed as if they were all connected with each other especially at that time of the day, Although this wasn’t new to him but his facial contortions showed that something was wrong with him. It was completely different day, he had woken up to a nightmare and he knew it was unusual of him to have a nightmare right from his childhood days he hardly had any dream other than those that he had after watching the horror movies, but this nightmare was different.. It seemed to have no relevance to spook him off but he felt that it was indicating something to him of his future. Right under the showers he was trying too hard to decode what exactly the dream meant, but he hardly could remember what it really was. He looked down at the swirling water to realize that it was about quicksands , a chill wave ran through his spine although water was rushing down his face he kept his eyes wide open with horror, it wasn’t cause of the dream.. he knew it.

Avinash was done with his bathing and dried himself off, he had put on other set of clothes. He knew that the dream had some significance to his life but he wasn’t really able to figure it out correctly.. He was damn sure about it being some kinda puzzle or a problem where he was driven into it..

Avinash was in no mood to go back to his sleep after the nightmare but his eyes were already tired of the last night’s bash that he had for completing his engineering. Avinash unlike others in his friends circle was too analytical and hence he knew it was a double entendre and it definitely had some relevance to his life. He never wanted it to be anyway related to his career but it seemed that it was too related to his career aspiration. Although he was an atheist in heart he just closed his eyes which was comforting for his tired eyes but his bedraggled thoughts weren’t making it easy for him to go back to sleep.. he just thought about his parents and said to himself in a loud audible tone .

I’m not gonna lets this happen.

Throw me into even a whirlpool

I’ll be back !! Regardless of the situation that i’d be pushed into…

he pauses for a moment and says it again ..

I’ll be back !!

I’ll be baaaack  (almost screamingly)

And he punches in air with a jolt across his body and it seemed that it was indeed a demoralizing nightmare that he had and he isn’t  fluttered by it.. It seemed that he was trying to concentrate on building a better Body language and muster his courage.. It was new to him but it seemed that he was too focused as far as his career was concerned and he never wanted it to be in jeopardy. He passed his rest of his waking time in the early morning trying to visualize his wonderful days in college and he ended up sleeping thinking about it almost when everyone was awake.

P.S: I should get serious about writing this thing down as early as possible just to prove my readers that i’m alive 🙂

“The Transition”

Day Zero

Sun was almost shining at its peak as if it was angry at someone despite the ferocious heat “Avinash” was in peace and sound asleep hugging his chubby pillow.. it seemed that he was dreaming about some gal and hence came the faint voices of him trying to cuddle the gal of his dream.. His mom shouted for the nth time to wake him up but in vain..

She almost lost her interest in her sleeping Kid and started continuing with her chores of cooking food. Avinash’s sweat filled face and his facial expression showed that he was almost done with his dream and was almost sound asleep.

A sound seemed to run towards him it looked like some old juke box was running towards him,and when it happend to come closer to his room he happened to realize that it was his dad. He came pumping from downstairs to his room carrying his mobile which was on charge for the past 3 hours and almost shouted at him instantaneously giving him a  jolt at his shoulder..

It was almost instantaneous that Avinash woke up as if he was part of some obscure Military training. He was almost half awake but his father voice made him sit upright. His father was a retired Inspector and he was keen to enforce discipline into him but there was hardly an effect on his last child. The guy’s face was sweat filled and he was almost trying to hide his abdomen cause he often sleeps naked when he was allowed to sleep alone and at that instant he was semi naked. He looked at his Dad with his partially opened eyes..

“phone for you”

“what paaa ?? I hardly had some sleep.. don’t you know that i slept only by 2 yesterday”

“dei its from your friend ”

“so what?? is that from srini?? ”

“who srini ?? ”

“what was the display on the phone when the call was ringing?? was it rocket ?? ”

“No it was written as `Kolandai da Kid`.. “

Avinash stared at his dad for some time cluelessly with almost his drool filled mouth and his shabby looking hair and his Dad at the same instant was thinking about why his son was staring back at him in such a strange way .. but Avinash was thinking deeply about the intent of the caller, cause he knew this “Kolandai” unlike his name was a serious guy .. and he used to call him only when he had a motive and hence he said to his dad again.

“paaa is he still on the line ??  give me the phone “

His dad handed him the phone and went away grumbling that he was growing worse day after day…

“paaaa (almost screaming at his Dad annoyingly) close the door on ur way out.. “

Continue reading

Dream Date

The room went pitch dark, I just lighted the candle. The sparkle in her eyes almost made the moment for me. Her brownish eyes were so pleasing to look at.

“Honey let your tongue taste it…”

She just Licks a drop of it and looks back with amusement…

“Cariño !! You suck in making Spanish sopas.”

P.S: This post is dedicated to those who thought i’d never be able to match up to this 55 word fiction challenge. Its 55 words precisely 😛

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Who screwd me ??

I succumbed to swetha’s wish when i wasn’t supposed to..

I chose to Let her copy while i was busy worrying about the days i would spend in the ground playing along with my other friends.

I chose to kick a gal in her tummy just cause she insisted me to do it .

It was the usual Boy Vs Gals chat and it was a group chat and almost a furious one and i happened to be the dormant guy in the chat when the gal went on insisting that someone kick her if they had the guts and with no one daring to do anything i chose to kick her without even knowing about her in the very first week at the new school, later did i realize that she was yet another kid of a teacher in the same school and ended up sobbing the whole day after she having a conversation with her mom. Continue reading

Hola !!

Over the past few weeks i was really into learning Spanish, cause i was running out of ideas and every single sitcom that i followed started ending. 😦 Hence i went on full charge to learn the language. Atleast that could help me boast of doing something useful in this extended transition period.

The thoughts of various Spanish words were doing its rounds and i was just thinking about my options of flirting with the Spanish gals if they are around. I was sitting in a Spanish looking Bar, I was so immersed into the Spanish way of thinking and the way things panned out in front of my eyes i thought it was my delusion, but when i peeked out i couldn’t control my emotions but it looked very similar to Latin American ranches around. The sky was brightly lit but at the same time it wasn’t as scorching as it is in Chennai and hence i was doubly sure that i wasn’t in Chennai , since it was bright enough the bar was lit only by the sunlight that was straining against the wooden windows but it was adequately lighted up and it looked pleasing to eyes having to look at a lounge with different shades spread around the walls due to the lighting. The few young Latin American guys were busy sipping their beer and enjoying the drink.I being a teetotaler was happy to have a Juice served to me but i was just staring at the glass cause i was so skeptical about the contents of the juice.

It was an awesome place to be with a wonderfully sunlit place and a Juice which looked really inviting. The moment i started to think of drinking it. I felt a small football hit me in my chest. I blurted a word in Tamil that sounded very similar to vodka 😉 and turned to my surprise there was a gorgeous cute little Latin gal standing only as tall as the table was and she gestured me for the ball, and hence i just picked the ball and said

Whacky: Beunos Dias Darling .. (was just gesturing the gal to go to their parents across the room)

The room was so beautifully lit and the way the girl looked back and smiled was truly marvelous scenario and I was really slow to let that moment sink into me. Out of nowhere somebody bumped me and spilled something on me from the back and i was like WTF now?? why am i not even allowed to enjoy a minute of my happiest moments and I turned back to see who was it and to my surprise there was a group of girls seated  in the table right behind me and there was a gorgeously looking spanish gal (SpaGal) who stood there right behind me with juice in her hand (i don’t know what it was and was hardly bothered) and ..

Cutie: Pardon, Lo siento
Whacky : Su bien ( like the every other usual drooling guy but since i never wanted to be tagged as a drooler i wanted to act in dignified way but couldn’t control myself.. 😛 )

I was so stumped at the beauty that was standing so close to me that i never wanted to miss the chance and turned back again to just continue gawking at her wonderfully soft  face which was the only thing that was visible and my eyes were glued to it despite me trying to talk to the girl.  I often stay away from girls but this was one of those moments where i couldn’t help myself and wanted to get hold of this gal and spark a conversation, having seen some of her friends catching me watching her, I resorted to have a sip of the juice and while sipping thought about why was the girl standing ?? and suddenly out of a sudden had a wonderfully soft hand touch my shoulder and i felt like floating and came back to sense and turned back to see the girl and …

Whacky : Yeah !! ( Mustering up myself) Puedo ohhhh ahhh ayudarle ( i Know i was blurting)
She : can i have the seat ??                                                                                       Whacky : yeah have it !!

the moment she sat.. like every other guy i was trying to correct my shabby hair and try to speak in spanish very much trying to build the rapport which i hated doing until then… and i was really having conflicting thoughts..

Whacky: Ah blow Ingless.. entiendo castelyano Um poco .. 😦
Cutie: Its ok !! I don’t mind I can speak Ingless..

Deep in my mind i was happy that she would understand me.. being content continued drooling at her.. I happened to be still glued at her eyes and was almost eavesdropping when she almost knocked me and said..

Cutie : Are you drunk ??
Whacky : Nope .. But i guess i’m High .. right now after watching you..

Continue reading

Funny Nostalgic School Days

I was growing tired of learning for hours together and writing scipts and analysing the various init.d scripts which was quiet evident on some of my posts, but i really was tired yesterday so i sought refuge in the various chats that i have with my friends . Although i have it on a regular basis but this time i was eager to listen to them and make a mockery of them , unlike the usual chats and conferences this time i wanted to take the initiatives so when i opened the pidgin tool i was so eager to chat when a school mate of mine logged in, I was more than happy and I was ROFLING cause he reminded me of the “little Jamal” of Slumdog millionaire.SO the chat went like this..

ME : hey !! how are you ??
Kanday: I’m fine da !!
ME: Hows everything in the training da ?
Kanday: Its cool buddy..
Me: hey wasteland.. did you watch “Slumdog Milionaire” ??
Kanday: I’m really Busy da..
Me: Busy with the gals or with the coffee machine..
Kanday: Shit !!!
Me: U must watch the movie,it remind me of you in the shithole 🙂

And with the mention of shit hole he logged out. But he was on ym and poor guy didn’t know that i use pidgin and i pinged him again and he fled out of it 🙂 . I did not know with what intent he logged in, but he really tickled me to the fullest and i was like ROFLMAO’ing  really, and the worried look on my Mom and Dad’s face realized me how weird my act looked like to them especially when the time was 11.00 P.M. My mom even volunteered to ask me if everything was OK , cause she was worried of me sticking to the PC and learning scripting language and working on MySQL cause i learn things at a stretch.

The guy really made me light and made me think about the good old school days. Things did happens even before i came to chennai, but after I came to chennai some things kept me really captivated and made me stick to chennai, this was just one of the incidents with few friends of mine which made me glued to the city. You might think what really made me go rolling after the chat..?? He was actually one of my classmates  an incident involving him and a shit hole was a pinnacle of comedy/pranks  one would expect at schools.

My school was no exception to all the usual passion filled games and the pranks that happen usually, but i think we broke the levels at some instances . We as a batch were a  cricket crazy batch and often resorted to play cricket at every  possible instance provided. I don’t exactly remember the exact day or date or even the month, but it was in the rainy season and since we never had a good relations with Physical trainer at school we were never given a chance to use some of the equipments available at school, so at every instance of us asking for a cricket bat ended up in vain, but we relentlessly went and asked him but this day (when the “event” happened ) was different and he offered us a football instead of cricket kit, although most of us showed our discontent with a grimace on our faces, but he bullied us to play football and since it was a rainy season it was hard to play football, he left us in the ground having no other way we resorted to playing football with our own rules 🙂 (actually inspired by all the violence at the club level games 😛 )

Believe me or not the school playground wasn’t a well maintained one so it was filled with either stones or potholes and ground itself never looked like a plain surface to play football, despite all these hindrances and since it was kinda drizzling and we all being in an excited state of atleast doing something that would sap our energies, especially coming after the boring class of “Geography” class  about different kinds of Soils started playing the game with the vigor that none would expect from us and often few said “jai hanuman” while attacking the ball (oops balls 😛 ) . The game wasn’t played with the rules in mind unlike those that are played in other schools, it was as if a melee happening around the ball or a flood relief being distributed and often times the ball was never ever the aim of the kicker like these games. So it was just another passion filled game that we used to play.

The game moved away from being played with the real spirit of the game and started taking other directions, like people started tiring other, tried dodging others on the field and then when people started really running short of ideas me tiring and running out of all the available options to end the game and get back to enjoy the rain siting in the classroom’s luxurious fans, i thought of an evil idea of making fun, but this one was really evil cause it involved shits 🙂

Being a brat in a class, one often has a group to propagates ones evil ideas, and i was no exception to it, so what really was that as we were playing really at a slow pace, with my ideas propagating through the group suddenly the class picked up the momentum in which the game was played and we started moving to a pit (an abyss to be more precise) and it was filled with all kinds of waste be it crap or bullshit and to make it worse it became a swamp cause of the water logging in the rainy season. So when the football went closed to the hole someone kicked it into the hole and as all the class was moving with the ball , everyone gathered around the pit and everyone gazed at it, and everyone started giving reasons for not entering the pit, unlike other plans this took a time cause the target (the main scapegoat )  was a real sloth and had to move from the other corner of the ground to the pit, i expected him to come to me cause i looked like a innocent guy and despite me making him embarrass amidst the whole school still he sticks to me (atleast till this incident happened) . But this time he was cautious i think, so moved close to another guy , but he wasn’t any better than me when it comes to playing pranks and actually we were accomplices when it comes to implementing the pranks.

Suddenly people started playing the blame games and asked every other guy to take the ball and everything worked as per plan, so “Kanday” (the guy ) looked around and wasn’t even involving himself in the heated conversation. But I along with my accomplices had him as the target and the guy went around him,but he was caution really cautious and even avoided the pushing attempt by one, but the guy was relentless caught him and threw him in !!! believe me or not he really threw him into the pit and he was like the “little jamal” drenched out of shit :P,but the guy really did not stop amusing us right there, unlike any other guy who would have called his mother/father/brother or any god he started screaming in high pitch calling “SAKTHIMAN” as if he would come to his rescue, but this really made us go ROFLing on the ground and he was like “Mudhalvan arjun” but smelled like the “little jamal” out of the pit :), even after a minute of us rofling he was still shouting for shaktiman !!, the guy’s screaming made some of the peons in the school run and rescue him and then followed an investigation and rest was history as we went on to become the talk of the staff rooms and principal room :).

P.S: I Couldn’t disclose his identity cause he went on to become a womanizer in  S.R.M Deemed University, C.S.E department, and if you are really persistent of getting his identity all that i would say is that he had a long name like the guys from Andra and he had a middle name of what kamal hasan had in P.“K”.S, and the guy often involves in Help talk and speaks French when he tries speaking in English, thats actually his specialty 😛

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Wakeup call For Tuxers !!!

Right from my childhood, i remember there was always a section of people who consider mocking at the nerds as their prerogative and never ever back down from it regardless of the situation. But with time i think the scenario has changed a lot.People have moved on and while most people still meet in the public and have those mocking sessions regularly, its often the online chats, discussion forums, social networking sites like FB,orkut, diggs,del.ic.ious, twitter et all has become their sole medium of communicating with others and since all these places are filled with the nerds these days it often becomes hard for people of the mocking group suppressing their ignorance atleast in the virtual world.

xkcd.com

I’m always in the lookout for news propping up from the nix world ,so when i picked up this peice of news, It went like this ..

“A Wisconsin woman has claimed that Dell computers and Ubuntu have kept her from going back to school via online classes. She says she has called Dell to request Windows instead however was talked out of it. Her current claim is that she was unaware that she couldn’t install her Verizon online disk to access the Internet, nor could she use Microsoft Word to type up her papers.”

i being one of the millions of Linux -advocates, thought that she was a no-brainer and i went ahead and blamed her for all the nuisance that she created and quotes about dumbs went through my head  like those of …

Beauty fades, but dumb is forever.   -Judge Judy

You can’t fix stupid.  – Ron White

Lieutenant Dannnn! Ice Cream!  – Forrest Gump’s line 🙂

I went ahead and even thought the fact that She’s enrolling at the Madison Area “Technical” College, and couldn’t be bothered to read the specs on a laptop she ordered? this made me go ROFLing. I even thought this as yet another act of how dumb the blonds really are.  It’s not as though Dell hides what OS comes with each laptop, and went on with the fact that she did not understand it’s possible to configure Internet access without that Verizon CDrom, and she could easily work with OpenOffice instead of Word. Verizon even offered to send a technician to help with the connection, and the school said it has no problems with people using different software when following their courses.But despite all these she went ahead and blamed Dell and Ubuntu for it. I know its hard for any noob to learn the *nix box inside out in days, but i know its equally hard to shift OS.

When i really went about introspecting about the article only then did i realize the fact that shouldn’t the *nix world be bothered about it despite all the discussion about how low the woman was towards the *nix world. Deep in my heart i felt, somewhere Ubuntu in particular has lost the script, especially when people consider things like Ubuntu going mainstream and here was a woman (a noob) who went ahead and ordered a Dell box with the Ubuntu, was that an ideal chance for the Ubuntu to show how good the OS is ?? Only then did i realize that it was no fault of the woman to have reported the problem , it should have been considered in a positive way rather than replying back to the article as some blot in whole of the nix world. Shouldn’t the nix developers consider its time that people are moving into the nix world and its they who have to make it user friendly to dethrone the M$ from its so called OS dominance ?? Shouldn’t all the service providers like the various ISP et all become *nix friendly ?? Its time , people should get responsible with days, and i’m sure the *nix boxes aren’t gonna be staying as “Nerds only Toys” in future.

I know there is whole lot of communities and forums to help a noob get into the the *nix world in general and ubuntu in particular, but isn’t it mandatory for them to have an Internet connection before they could access those online forums ?? Not all here would have the luxury of Vmware or VirtualBox or Zen. People have changed so have the *nix world from the ages of CUI’s but the middlemen haven’t changed.  Its time that people change their mindset and open up for the new revolution thats taking on in the world  and understand whats needed to reach the source of information rather than go howling in the forums and others of its kind.

I’m glad people have started responding to things on a larger scale but they have started responding in a wrong way, shouldn’t they look at things positively, isn’t life about being positive ? I don’t know what would have gone through her mind when she would have got all those scathing remarks about the article on the FaceBook  page. This only reminds me of a strip from the a web comic called xkcd

Linux is Not about Free in price ,
Its about free As in freedom

Ubuntu !! Jai ho 😛

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What Exactly Does GOD Tests IN a Fresher ?

Regardless of what walks of life one currently is in one would have always thought that god did test him at some point of time, but have you ever pondered about what exactly is his tool of testing ? If its the real test of character then its only the PATIENCE of the person that is tested. Regardless of what walks of life a person is in if you ask him about what truly tested you to the core , all that he would say it was his patience if he really sat down and gave a thought about it. Life hasn’t been kind to all people especially for the past few months ( if you have been really careful noticing things its the past year or so).Firstly it was the sub-prime issue in the US which triggered a chain reaction which unfolded in various forms and affected each and every person in every kind of proportion right from last year be in the inflation to the salary. The period of time when we thought that the issue at hand was getting resolved we saw quiet a lotta banks going into bankruptcy which led to panicking in the various global stock exchanges and which in turn affected each and every guy regardless of whether he was a street hawker or was a CEO of a company. Freshers out of colleges were the worst affected people, and everyone handled them as some emotionally detached being on earth. Right when it was thought that the situation is creeping back to normalcy yet another issue crept in the form of Maytas|satyam merger fiasco which directly affected the job market in general and the Indian IT industry in particular. Although every single guy on any particular crappy news channel suggests that measures are taken so as to bring back the confidence of the clients back to normalcy and despites these measures there is always the backbiting issue of companies picking the others clients.

A freshers, who is unlikely to be called a fresher after having patiently waited for 7 long months for the situations to improve and having a strong faith in the company that recruited him finds himself in trouble again and again.It wasn’t an issue until now cause there was collectively a huge number of people who were waiting to be called in, but right when the crowd seems to disperse with time the real panicking starts to kick in and often the troubled minds start to rekindle their very thought of having a career in IT and think of other options like the I.E.S, Sevices sector et. all, especially when one has an unsupportive family at home and one really has personal problems of his own. Families which totally depended on a guy’s income to feed them really gets desperate and even a guy with a stubborn thought about having a prolific career in IT would rethink of his decision to wait for things to get normal. Now especially when few of the companies have started calling in people, the left few people really get to bogged down that they start doing weird things, it really becomes hard to control such a mind in such a troubled situation to have a peaceful life at home.Its just during this troubled time should one have faith in patience. I’d  like to quote..

“Only those who have the patience to do simple things perfectly will acquire the skill to do difficult things easily.”

-Johann Friedrich von Schiller-

I personally think this situation is much more than a mere test its about faith in ones abilities and his skills and test of his mental strength.

“Its not how good one behaved when there was a herd following him that matters its just how one reacts to a situation in private that determines how good a character one is made of.”

Being part of such a herd which collectively went through the trouble and watching them get dispersed, and few of them coming back add wounds never really helps, but one really has to understand that there would always be people who are sadists and one should look at the positive side of things and make it a point to prove to the world that one can prove the point regardless of the situation one is forced into. Its truly the test of time and patience and one really has to be totally focused on what exactly is his/ her priority and get never bogged down at the situations that people around you throw at you, its how well you handle such situations makes you get stronger mentally. I’d say..

“Patience is the need of the hour and perseverance to your goals would make you happier down the lane”

All that i could remember inspirational right now is a song from Colonial Cousin’s song “Krishna Nee Bega Baro“.

Time is the healer ..
Time moves on..
Time don’t wait for anyone
You tell you’ll be back
But that will take some time
I’m waiting… ahh……
I’m waiting… Waiting…
I’m waiting….

And i’d like to end this post on a quote from a progenitor of the theory of “positive thinking”, cause I know how one feels to have gone through such a crappy situation.

If you want to get somewhere you have to know where you want to go and how to get there. Then never, never, never give up.                                                                                                       – Norman Vincent Peale –

P.S : I think i’m bit too philosophical at this time, should have really refrained from posting here, which seems to be a good source of entertainment for at least some of the people, I shouldn’t inflict the thought of sorrow into them but i feel that i should share this so that at least select few would be motivated and stick to what they really wanted.

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Nerdy Way of Starting a Year

restart

#P.S: Non-Geeks please spare me,this ones just for the  *nix Geeks.

#P.P.S: I hope this is what a geek/nerd/whacked out soul would do if at all he rants in his *nix box writing files about it and tries to clear it off their memory by writing a script and moving it to the cron.yearly directory 😉

#P.P.P.S: @Nerds: I’m a Noob as far as scipting is concerned please do spit out the errors in the script in the form of comments :P, If you think it could have been simpler in Perl Or Python, you are right but i haven’t ventured into other scripting languages 😉

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